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5 Old Fashioned Dating Customs That Don't Make Sense Today

Written By Matt S.
Image By Sunshine Rabbit
Tags dating, dates, customs,

Although dating is a much different game than it was a generation ago, many old fashioned dating customs are still in use today. The problem is that these customs don't always have the same positive effects as they did in the past, and can even hurt your dating success. No matter how much dating experience you have, you might learn a thing or two from this list.

1. Waiting Three Days Before Calling
So you have a beautiful girl's number, now what? Wait three days before calling, right? Wrong! Unless you're out of town or have a serious emergency, waiting three whole days to call a girl after getting her number is a bit ridiculous. Girls are very aware of this rule and might be put off if you try it. Waiting three days is also a problem because it just kills your momentum. If you had a good initial meeting with a particular girl and wait three days to call her, she might start having second thoughts about you in the meantime.

You don't have to call her immediately after meeting her, but it doesn't hurt to call her the next day or just two days later. The purpose of the three day rule is to not appear desperate, but the truth is that calling after even three days you can still do plenty to make yourself look desperate. On the flip side, if you call the next day, there's plenty you can do to make yourself not look desperate.

Some important things to do are to call her just to talk and possibly arrange a date. Keep everything casual and have at least a vague idea of what you would like to do on a future date. As long as you keep things casual and not make it seem like you have to see her right away, you won't come off as desperate. In fact, being straight forward early on is definitely a sign of confidence, which will bring you more luck than waiting three days to call her.

2. Buying Flowers And Gifts On A First Date
If you still think you need to buy flowers and gifts for a girl on a first date, you're living way in the past. These days, buying flowers on a first date can make you come off too strong, which is never a good thing. Flowers and gifts still have a place in dating, but not as early as a first date. If you start things off with flowers and gifts, you'll put a lot of pressure and expectation on your date. Instead of buying flowers, just bring yourself to the date. The main purpose of dating is to get to know other girls, and all you need for that is yourself.

3. The Dinner Movie Date
If you ask your parents if they've been on a dinner movie date together, the answer will probably be yes. Dinner movie dates are very old fashioned and are still used frequently, but they don't make a whole lot of sense. While a nice dinner does facilitate good conversation, a movie hardly helps. If you go to a movie theater with a girl, how can you even talk to her? If you can't hold a conversation with a girl during a date, you're just wasting time. Another problem with dinner movie dates is that they feel too date-like. When you're just trying to get to know a girl, spending a very date-like evening together will put unneeded pressure on both you and your date.

Again, the dinner portion of a dinner movie date is fine, it's the movie portion that is the issue. Instead of following dinner with a movie, try something different like taking a walk at a nearby park or visiting an art gallery. Anything that will keep the interaction and conversation going in a meaningful way will allow you and your date to get to know each other better, which is exactly what you want. Only after getting comfortable with a girl and spending more time with her should you take her on a dinner movie date.

4. Paying For Everything
It doesn't hurt to pay for a date, but it isn't something you should feel required to do. If you feel like you have to pay for every date you go on, you might be taken advantage of. You could attract the attention of a girl that enjoys being wined and dined on your tab. To avoid this type of situation, you should just refuse to pay for all of the dates you go on, right? Unfortunately it's not that simple. If you refuse to pay or insist to split every bill, you run the risk of appearing cheap, which can be a huge turnoff.

The best approach to take is to offer to pay for the first bill that comes your way. If your date tries to pull out her wallet, tell her she can get the next one. If she makes no effort to pay her fair share, don't worry. She might be doing this just to avoid fighting over the bill. Eventually, she'll offer to pay for something, but if she doesn't, you might have a mooch on your hands. When you're dating a girl, she should be just as excited to see you as you are to see her. If she really wants to see you, she'll eventually pick up the bill.

5. Being Overly Chivalrous
If you want to make a good impression on a girl, it might seem like a good idea to open doors for her, help seat her, and act like a complete gentleman. While these things are all well and good, they don't always help improve your chances of impressing girls. Acting overly chivalrous can get in the way of normal social interaction and can even make your date feel insulted.

It's still a good idea to be respectful and courteous towards your date, but you don't want to overdo it. By being overly chivalrous, you run the risk of putting your date on a pedestal, which can easily land you in the friend zone. Instead, you should be flirting with your date while keeping an interesting conversation going. Acting rigid and overly chivalrous can create barriers between you and your date which won't help either of you.

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